Photo: Brady dressed for formal Black&White day at schoolI'm afraid the ol' blog is going to get neglected a bit. This new school-ruled lifestyle of ours is a little difficult to navigate. I feel busier than ever, now that we're tied to someone else's calendar. And I'm tired. So for today, a few random thoughts (format inspired by Kelly) to match my skittish mood.
1. I'm detoxing from drugs. Ok, meds really, but saying drug detox sure has more of a ring to it, eh? I've been downing allergy meds like pez for the past month. This allergy season was especially horrid, probably due to the gazillion inches of rain we got in August. The meds make me jittery and keyed up and cause insomnia (worse than my usual insomnia), which are not helpful characteristics when they accompany large life transitions. I've been off the meds for 3 days now and have had a massive headache instead. Lovely. This makes me pissy. Just ask Rob.
2. Mom and I were grouching about fall today. Everyone says fall is such a lovely season but I can't help being a little resentful of it, seeing as it ushers in winter - which is too damn long - which brings on my SAD - which causes me to grumble about silly things and my husband to utter things like "not this again". And we pined away for the deep greens of spring and the deep spring-like green we experienced this August, thanks to the flooding rains. (Does every gift have to come with a cost? I'm giddy about my green yard while others are wading in 3 feet of water in their living rooms.)
3. I get to mama a whole new bunch of kids. It's too early to judge, but the pattern so far is that the same few parents attend the high school soccer games and therefore we frequently find ourselves schlepping extra kids, making phone calls to find lost players, & waiting to see that all are accounted for before we head for home (they're usually not). It's interesting to find that in the homeschooling world I sit on the very far lenient/hands-off/trusting end of the spectrum, and in the school world I seem to be the meddling/hands-on/overly-involved parent. I know others have had 8 years more practice in sending the kids off for the day and trusting that all will be well, but beyond that, I want to be there. I want to be a part of it. Already parents ask me what time the game will be over, when practice ends, who we're playing tomorrow, and when will the bus return. And I'm cool with that. I got in my van yesterday to find 4 new faces and I laughed and said, "Who are you and what are you doing in my van?" The reply: "Thank you for the ride Mrs... Mrs... Mrs. Brady's mom!" Not a problem, my new friend, not a problem.
4. Brady and I had laughing fits over his algebra homework tonight. Let it be known algebra was not my strong area in school, so I'm basically 1/2 page ahead of Brady. Meaning I recognize having done it before, but have to review the examples myself in order to help him. I think he was doing a problem incorrectly tonight, then another. He insisted he was right. We bantered back and forth in fun and he said, "Wanna bet?" and I said, "Bring it" and we've got $5 riding on 2 separate problems. He thinks it's a hoot that he gets to tell his friends tomorrow that he and his mom are betting money on his homework. It's important to me to set a reeeal good example like that.
5. One day into school - Brady told me about a teacher and said, "She's got the same philosophy as you, Mom."
Two weeks into school - He.Couldn't.Be.More.Wrong.
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11 comments:
That last line was a cliffhanger. Maybe you should buy some brass knuckles. Or assemble a posse and challenge the woman. Sending you 'hang in there' vibes.
That's the tricky thing about a blog, y'know? Not necessarily the best place to spout venom. I took it out on the stairmaster at the fitness center this morning. I feel better now. :)
The script was all wonky on this last post so I clicked on it and Brady's picture goes full screen on me--which was very cool cuz I was actually going to post on that-Weird!
I love young men dressed up in fancy duds. I remember seeing Brendan first dressed up for homecoming or other formal dance things and being amazed at how "manly" he was turning out after just experiencing him as a squirrel full of boy juice. The movement away from mama's circle is inevitable (we hope, you do want him to be on his own some day!) and supremely satisfying when he's "turning out" so well.
Another thing, that was unexpected and strangely wonderful when the picture went big on me--I saw the Gah-dess necklace I made for you on the corner of the picture hanging on the wall. I know you're not a big wearer neck-gear but to see it there as a talisman was an answer to a private wandering in my own mind. And as a backdrop for Brady in black and white dapper wear--well the implication is sublime.
Ah yes, it's there my friend, watching over us all (but mostly - me!). It's also accompanied me on many outings and has rested on our Sinsinawa altar several times as well. It holds great significance for me, and I'm still just so smitten (speechless, even - quite the feat, mind you) that you made that for ME.
Let's talk about our teabag headdresses again... better yet, let's find another occasion to gussy up in 'em!
Bah!
Is this where we are to step in and complain with you?
Should I complain even though you stomped it out at the gym?
If you're over it - then skip this one, if not then....
"same philosophy" cut me to the quick, as I am sure it did you! I'd be angry, not at my child, but for a system/teacher seducing my child into thinking that regimented and arbitrary teaching was Not So Bad.
aaaaargh!
(Just remember he's not been jaded, and believes it... and that is to your credit!)
Yeah, yeah, good teachers/exceptions, and all that, but still! They don't love 'em as we do, and to pretend they do is just mean.
Isn't it?
:/
I could be so wrong...
er - I meant "same philosophy" he believes, not that "schools aren't so bad".
We haven't lost entirely yet!
(pained laugh)
On another note - even if he gets to that point, "schools aren't so bad", dear friend, and even if he excels and shines, never, never, never entertain the notion that he would be somehow greater "if only"!
If he goes into school now, and Loves it, and shines - then again, that's to your credit, not because it is where he was meant to be all along.
Should he continue through, and into college, shining and excelling, then that is his current truth, but not his past one.
He came to you for a reason... you prepared him for His Life for a reason, you mother the way you do for A Reason, and never doubt it.
Sending more big hugs and squeezing your hand, Steph (who hopes she wasn't out of line with all this supposing)
You're not out of line... but you might make me cry. :) Thx again - the "if only" demon was making some brief appearances...
Today is another day.
er - sorry to take up so much space - but I wanted to clarify that I meant never doubt that he should have been in school all along, not that you shouldn't be entertaining thoughts of him coming home and saying "i'm done with school". Dream all you want, I say, jsut don't doubt that you did the absolutely best thing for him.
I'm sure you're not thinking along those lines, but being vulnerable and on shaky ground can do tricky things to our psyche - make us doubt our choices, sometimes.
But what I really want to know is this - who won the bet?
See, I think that's just awesome, and it's why I know you guys are going to get through this school thing.
It's like you're having to learn to trust yourself in an entirely different language and culture. But your instincts are still there, and still wonderful.
The bet? Oh yes, the bet. Um, well, you see, it's been a long time since I've had algebra, and so it really wasn't a fair fight. At ALL. So, you know.
That rocks! Good for you for owning up. But you know, this is YOUR victory, too, right? If we tweak it just right, it's proof that unschooling works, since I'm assuming you weren't unschooled and he was? ;P
Seriously, I hope that things are settling in for you a little bit. I've been thinking about you guys.
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